We Are Alive

A year ago, I was terrified. I woke up in the grossest trailer in the middle of nowhere Ohio. We had no money at all. I was sicker than I've ever been. Matt was completely tangled up in depression, anxiety,and really deadly feelings. By some stroke of luck, we checked our PayPal account and there was $300 in there. Matt packed up the car and had the scariest anxiety induced blackout ever. We got on the road to go as far as we could toward Oregon. Eventually he came back to reality. I was so sick that every minute in the car was hell. I said I had to rest. Indianapolis was the nearest major city where Matt could door dash and make some money. We got to the Extended Stay and completely crashed. Snuck in the rabbits and just showered and slept for who knows how long. I desperately needed medical care and Matt desperately needed to get to a hospital. But I wouldn't survive with him there. We didn't know anyone in Indianapolis. Or anything about Indianapolis. My family didn't care what was happening and refused to show so much as remorse. We wouldn't be alive today if it weren't for our friends, acquaintances and strangers who helped us. I'm not being melodramatic. We would have literally died.

I am so grateful we are alive. Matt got the help he needed. I actually got a diagnosis, multiple actually, and a specialist in my condition which is very hard to find. We live in a safe home and will be moving somewhere soon where we won't have to pay rent. Matt is getting paid $98 a day to take care of me full time. I have a power chair. We got rid of our car payments and bought a car out right in great condition for its age. Most of our debts are gone through paying down and bankruptcy. All of our animals are still with us and healthy. Kermit is going to be 10 this month. Petal will be 8. Loretta will be 7. Damon's birthday is in January but he'll be 7. Damon has a boyfriend and favorite people here. The veterinarians we have are amazing. We've made some really amazing genuine giving wonderful friends and stayed in touch with our best friends back home and around the world. We are soooo blessed. And we're alive. We are alive. WE ARE ALIVE.

"This life will be beautiful but not without heartache. In death comes peace but pain is the cost of living. Like love, it's how we know we're alive" -The Vampire Diaries