When I tell people I don't talk to my family

When I tell people I don't talk to my family I get a lot of different responses.  The one that always throws me off is when they say I need to forgive myself to heal from the trauma.  Forgive myself?  How is it my fault that I grew up in an enmeshed family?  How is it my fault that I was abused by this family into my 30s?  How is it my fault I was abandoned time and time again?  How is it my fault I was given adult responsibilities as a child?  How is it my fault that I thought I had to prove myself for love? How is it my fault that I would get pushed so far I would fall apart? 

None of this was my fault. I was a child when I learned these things were normal.  I didn't know any better nor did I have the opportunity to until one day I figured it out. I defended myself and stepped away gracefully.  I have nothing to feel sorry for. Nothing to forgive myself for.