Not Again

Heavy lids 

Foggy brain 

My speech is slurring 

Help, it's happening again 

Sucking me under 

No matter how much I resist

Not caring about what I want 

Pulling me down into my bed 

I'm trapped again 

Deep in sleep 

My demons find me

All night 

And through every nap 

I toss and turn,

Kick and fight,

Punch and scream 

But they just laugh at me 

Or tell me I'm ridiculous

Waking up feels worse 

Than when I fell asleep

My head is pounding 

Everything on my body hurts 

Like I did a heavy Zumba class 

My throat is on fire 

My brain doesn't work properly 

And then it has a nerve 

To try to suck me under again 

Back into my daily hell 

Back to my bed 

Back to my nightmares 

Just to wake up feeling worse 

Again and again